Well I was really rather hoping to be writing my next post talking about how glad we are to be back to normal – unfortunately Rosie is still in hospital. It would appear after managing two days off the oxygen she has taken a step backward and gone back on it – before she is discharged she will need to complete a full night with no oxygen whilst keeping her saturation levels in the mid to high 90's. At the moment this still seems miles off but as with last time she was in we couldn't see the end then suddenly she perked up and we were home before we knew it. I have been struggling this week to get my head around the fact that Rosie was only in Alder Hey for eight days after undergoing seven hours of open heart surgery to fix her complete AVSD, even then, post surgery, she suffered a pneumothorax (collapsed lung) and yet she was only in for eight days. Why then has she spent 28 days and counting (total time so far of last three stays) in hospital with what by comparison to above, seems like a glorified cold!?
It's very easy to slip into the mindset of, 'give us a break, why us' and I'm honest enough to admit I have been guilty of that in my brief moments of weakness or, 'wobbles' as I like to call them, but in the main I, and we, as a family are determined to try and take the positives from each hurdle we are faced with. This is something (another thing rather) that I have found easier to accomplish since Rosie's birth. I am fully aware that there are millions of families far worse off, going through far more traumatic experiences than us and whilst I by no means take any comfort in that it does help me keep things in perspective when I have mini 'wobbles.'
Karen has been nothing short of amazing having done all but one of the nights in hospital so far and I can't express enough how proud I am of her titanic efforts to remain positive, she has seen very little of her boys (I include myself here!) and that in itself cannot be easy for her (I exclude myself again at this point as she has probably enjoyed the break from my daily annoying habits!). On a positive note Rosie is better in herself and in truth we aren't really worried as she seems happier now than we've ever seen her, she's been shouting at people, being nosey looking and laughing at everyone on the ward and generally amusing Karen, her visitors and the nurses, however, she just needs to get off this last smidgen of oxygen and we should be bringing back a stronger, more determined Budlington, ready to tackle the next developmental challenge whatever that may be.
I'm finishing this post by sharing a song that has helped give me that little lift when I've most needed it and its fast becoming a bit of a Bachofner family anthem!
Ben Howard – Keep your head up